Keeping Up With This 40ish Mom

Second Friday of the month:  Personal / Motherhood

My lifestyle has evolved in a major way as I hit 40. It's only now that I took notice and appreciated all these changes in my life as a forty-three-year-old wife, and mother of the boy and the girl. I'm not going to turn serious here ha, but rather finding humor in the simple joys and pleasures that I've been experiencing lately, thanks to a change in perspective and channeling the law of attraction. Good vibes only, okay. It really works!

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Family Friday: Who's Valentine?

Second Friday of the month:  Marriage / Parenthood

Boy:  Mommy, is there school on Friday? 'Coz it's Valentine's day... 
Me:  Yes, it's on Friday, but you still have school, it's not a holiday.
Boy:  Oh, so it's just regular? Who's Valentine? But people are celebrating.  Teacher said we'll make a card for you.

That was our conversation in the car early this week.  And now, here's his jumbo Minion-themed family Valentine's card which he proudly showed me yesterday when I fetched him from school.  

"Look, it's a pop up card! See?"
He said this is for mommy, daddy, and M! =)  This boy is the sweetest!

Anyways, we don't really celebrate Valentine's Day in the family.  After getting married, V-day became less appealing as the years passed.  I actually forgot what was the last Valentine gift I received or gave. When the kids learned about this day of hearts in school, it was their turn to "celebrate" it with art projects that they make as gifts for me.  Here's his first Valentine pop-up card for me.

For me, Valentine's Day is more special for couples in the courtship stage, and those BF-GF status. Agree? Among my circle of friends, all married, majority never celebrate Valentine's anymore. It's just one of those days.  Come to think of it, married people should celebrate it more, just to rekindle those mushy and romantic moments of the early years, or simply to take advantage of this once-a-year occasion to have a spectacular date with you spouse.  Kahit once a year lang! =) So, I applaud all the married couples who still make that extra effort to surprise each other, of celebrate in any form during this love month.

Valentine's Day = Roses = Chocolates = Dinner Dates = Traffic.
Therefore, Valentine's = Traffic.
So, just stay home. =)  Such a scrooge, right?!

We never planned anything for today, but last night, J thought we can have breakfast after we bring the kids to school. Ok, breakfast date it is.  Better than nothing, hehehehe.

I was not able to answer the boy's question about who Valentine is (coz I forgot about it, and I have no time to look him up, hehehehe...) so if you do know, please tell me on the comment section below.

Do you have a memorable Valentine's Day?  Mine was when I received my engagement ring, 12 years ago.

Please share yours, I wanna know! :)

HAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY!

Have a sweet, romantic, and fabulous weekend!

Valentine's past:

A ring, a rose, a valentine's day

A Valentine poem

I'd love to know your thoughts on this post.  If you enjoyed this, feel free to share it!
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How to Build a Healthier Relationship with Your Partner

Second Friday of the month: Family Life / Marriage

I forgot when was the last time I wrote about marriage here.  Since it's Family Friday, I think it's the perfect time to share what I've learned from our SoMoms #BetterMe session last month conducted by Coach Pia Acevedo of One Core.  The talk was about building healthier relationships with our partner and children.  I'll focus on the partner portion for today.

 

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10 Years After 'I Do'...

“I have found the one my heart loves.”
Song of Songs 3:4

It was 10 years ago today that I walked down this aisle on a beautiful Saturday afternoon to marry J.

10 years (and 2 kids) today.  I'm stumped.
Wow.  For the first time, I really don't know what to share with you today! =)  I have been pondering about what to write for the past few weeks now but still blank.  I'll just type away and hope I make sense.

I actually planned on adding a lesson learned every year but I skipped writing about our anniversary last year 'cause I can't think of anything new or exciting to share.  And I believe I've written enough with my 7th and 8th anniversary posts, which I hope you can read first (if you haven't yet) to get a better idea of what I am taking about:

7 Random Things I've Learned
8th Random Thing I've Learned

I'm not sweet and mushy and I can't stand PDA, so please don't expect me to write a love letter here or send out a message to J, heehee...  Besides, it's OUR anniversary, so the well-wishes should be for both of us, right?  =)

I just wanted to say Thank You -- thank you to God and to the forces of the universe for bringing us together, for blessing us with two beautiful children, and everything that we are enjoying right now.  It was never easy, but it's been a good and solid 10 years.  I am still struggling as a wife, and mother.  There are old habits to break, and new ones to form.  I pray for inner strength and wisdom -- for me and J, for us to be a better spouse to each other.

That's it.  I'm signing out for now.  We're going on a stay-cation this weekend... with the kids!

Are you married?  Care to share what you've learned?
Let's compare notes and leave me some feedback. =)

I'd love to know your thoughts on this post.  If you enjoyed this, feel free to share it!
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Home-Style: Seamless Duplex Remodeling

Freestyle Friday: Special Feature


A duplex house is defined as a dwelling having apartments with separate entrances for two families. This includes two-story houses having a complete apartment on each floor and also side-by-side apartments on a single lot that share a common wall. - Wikipedia


Today's Home-Style feature puts the spotlight on this formerly 150-sqm. duplex unit which was transformed into a 400+ sqm., 2-storey single house with a basement in 2007. The house sits on a 300 sqm. lot, nestled in a quiet village in Quezon City, owned by my co-parents from school. With two young kids and three dogs, this beautifully remodeled home has a generous living space for a growing family, that also accommodates A's and C's many personal hobbies and interests.

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Home-Style: A Splash of Red, Black and White

I'm really glad that there are five Fridays on my birth month. For the regulars here, you know that having five Fridays in a month would make the 4th one as an anything-goes post, thus Freestyle Friday. It's also the best time to launch a new section for the blog -- and this one has been in the works way too long.

Introducing...

HOME-STYLE: a special section where I get to share my love for beautiful interiors and home design.

Home-Style shall feature design inspirations from real homes, with real stories behind the furniture pieces, accessories, theme, or colors that make up a beautiful dwelling for couples and families.

I am thrilled to present my first Home-Style feature today. What makes this extra special is the fact that the couple who resides in this spanking new flat are friends of mine from my previous work, and whom I've helped during their wedding planning days.  Theirs was the last full event I've organized, and now, we've come full circle with this spread on their stylish home.

FRAMES: NYTTJA - IKEA;  PILLOWS:  IKEA and LIFESTOREY;  STOOL: SOLSTA PALLBO - IKEA

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Christmas Wish List: What Women (Wives) Want

Second Friday of the month:  Family Friday - Homemakers / Wives


For this Family Friday post, I have decided to focus on what women want for Christmas. Well, in particular, what wives want! The wife and the mother are what we call in Filipino ilaw ng tahanan - the light in their homes that guide the family.  And most often than not, their needs and wants come in last.

The holiday season is just weeks away and though I planned to blog about gift ideas for kids, I thought it would be more interesting to know what many married women have been dreaming of and wishing to have.

So here's what I asked my blogger friends.
Hope you can share with me your TOP 3 CHRISTMAS WISH -- it can be from the most expensive to the cheapest.  Whatever you like to receive as a gift from your husbands or family, or friends. I know we all want to have good health, hugs and kisses, well-behaved kids, etc... but I need you to share something tangible, goods or services that you want. Don't be shy! :)

And now, what the wives want (wish!)...

Eliza wants...
1. An all-day head-to-toe spa extravaganza - something for myself
2. A 2-week China-Tibet trip with my husband (no kid) - something for myself and my husband
3. A top-of-the line kitchen renovation - something for myself and my family

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8 Years After 'I Do'...

Today, J & I celebrate 8 fruitful years of marriage.

We got married on November 30, 2002 which also happens to be Bonifacio Day -- a Philippine holiday to commemorate the birthday of the country's revolutionary hero named Andres Bonifacio. Now there's no excuse not to remember our wedding anniversary!

On hindsight, I just realized we've been a couple for 10 years already...but it felt longer!

Anyway, on our 7th anniversary last year, I made two back-to-back posts about our wedding.  So you have to read this first:

7 random things I learned in the first 7 years

So beginning today, and hopefully every year on our anniversary, I thought I would add one lesson to my list.
Note:  Whatever I decide to add to the list does not necessarily mean they are the 'ultimate' lessons I've learned that year, okay?

I definitely am not a marriage expert. We all know a perfect marriage in non-existent. But we live and learn.  There are just too many to remember and I will try my best to share what most of you can benefit and learn from as well. :-)

Here's #8:

8 Random Things I've Learned In 8 Years of Married Life

8. Accept the things you cannot change
As the Serenity Prayer goes: ...grant me the Serenity to accept the things I cannot change; Courage to change the things I can; and Wisdom to know the difference.

This applies to everything we encounter in life.  Once you're in a marriage, there will always be things about each other that you wished you could change or improve, or obliterate altogether! And some couples think they can actually change their partners to how they want them to be once they got together.  I've learned that as partners, we can both change, wholeheartedly, up to a certain point. Whether on our own or with each other's support. Choose you battles. It's a matter of accepting what you can't change, difficult as it may, that will allow you to move on, learning to compromise and live with those nuances, and grow stronger in marriage.

Prequel:
7 Random Things I Learned From Planning A Wedding
7 Random Things I've Learned In 7 Years of Married Life here


I'd love to know your thoughts on this post.  If you enjoyed this, feel free to share it!
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The Daddy (Hubby) Wish List

It's time for the man of the house to have HIS day on Sunday.  Though, honestly, I've noticed that Moms' day has always been a bigger deal than Dads' day don't you think?  :-)

Anyhow, for this Father's Day week, I have compiled some really cool stuff that has ranked high on the daddy / hubby 'wish list' poll I did the past week.

I must admit, most of the items here cost an arm and a leg.  If you're on a budget but still want to give (or receive) any of these, then I suggest you save (or no gifts at all) on all the annual occasions (Father's day, birthday, anniversary, Christmas, etc.) to afford one big-ticket item at the end of the year that your spouse or father truly desires and would definitely appreciate.  That's what J & I actually do.

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His Needs, Her Needs: Marriage in the 21st Century

Second Friday of the month:  Marriage

“The greatest thing that a parent can do for their children is to love and respect their spouse.”

Photo from wallpaper-s.org

Parenting is rooted in good husband and wife relationship. And having a strong relationship is vital in child rearing.  This is what consultants Tibbs and Vangie Evalle are espousing as advocates of good parenting and child development. They were the guest speakers from the third and final parenting seminar organized by DML Montessori Pre-School early this year, the first being about wellness and nutrition, followed by helpful parenting advice here. Like the past seminars I have attended, this talk on marriage was very enlightening, candid and straightforward as well.

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A Ring, A Rose, A Valentine's Day

For lovers, for friends, for husbands and wives, mothers and children, Valentine's Day is a special day spent in many different ways.

So, no matter what you do, what you give, or receive on this day of hearts...

...an engagement ring...

 

I received my engagement ring exactly 8 years ago today

 ...a paper rose...

 

My first (paper) rose from my sweet little boy

 ...blue chocolate Kisses...

 

Well...I just found these in the fridge  (",)

 

...always cherish the thought that goes with the gift, and time spent on this special day.

Hope you all had a beautiful, love-filled Valentine's Day!

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Tagaytay Family Holiday, Album 3: Taal Vista Hotel

Finally, the third and final installment of my series on our holiday trip last December 29 and 30, with highlights on our overnight stay at the historic Taal Vista Hotel, formerly Taal Vista Lodge, situated at the heart of cool Tagaytay City.

The boy poses in front of the fireplace at the lounge, creatively designed as a gingerbread house

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The Hubby is 30-ish

"If you have a wonderful husband who works hard and would give up anything for you, then re-post this...because great men are few and far between, and by the grace of God, I have one!"

Today, we celebrate my better half's 30th birthday...not!!! This is when he stopped counting, and I second that! Hahaha! I guess it just gets harder to accept that we're not getting any younger.  Despite the age, we learned to count our blessings, and with yet another year, we are thankful.  And I am thankful for having J in my life.  That shout-out on my opening above is from a few of my Facebook friends who posted it on their profiles. I found the line so timely and true for me, cheesy as it may sound, that I decided to humor my hubby by posting it as a greeting for him today. It was well-received.

Obviously, this entry is dedicated to J (",).

It is customary for us to have a joint birthday lunch with my brother, who's birthday is on the 5th, but that will be set another time with my parents.  For our actual birthdays, we usually eat out or just order in.  We did the latter and had a simple oriental dinner at home.

 Green soup made from pureed spinach, mixed with diced tofu, squid, shrimp, mushroom and egg.  It was good, but we've tasted better versions from other Chinese restaurants.

Since it is J's day today, I decided to order some of his favorite dishes from King Crab House along P. Guevarra in San Juan. I also thought I'd take home a Mango Shortcake from one of my favorite cake shops, Carla and Elaine's, but it was not available, and instead got the sinful Chocolate Decadence.

Birthdays will not be complete without the traditional birthday noodles.  This dish was a great combination of textures and flavors from the light and crunchy fried noodles, to the shrimp and pork sauce.

Of course I will not miss ordering the best-selling Crispy Salted Crabs.  Juicy, sweet as fresh crabs should, 'garlicky', and finger-lickin' good!

J's all-time favorite Chinese dish, the classic Sweet and Sour Pork.  This one has the right sweet-sour taste but the meat was slightly on the tough side. But still good.  

And now the most awaited moment of the day...the candle-lighting and blowing.  

The kids just love blowing out the candles, no matter who is celebrating.  And two rounds are not enough! (",)  It was J's idea to allow my girl to put as many candles as she can, and just make the cake all aglow. It did turn out quite spectacular with all the lighted candles.

Simple birthday cake -- Chocolate Decadence, made extra special with several lighted candles that included the lone yellow Smiley head. 

The girl before and after the cake-cutting. 

This is the moment she has been waiting for the whole day...to eat cake! And it was all worth the wait, as the cake was as decadent and rich as we imagined it would be -- two layers of moist chocolate cake covered in dark chocolate ganache and topped with thick caramel sauce. At the shop, I just requested for a greeting written on top and they added candy sprinkles, which my girl with a sweet tooth eagerly picked and scraped off the top as soon as we cut the cake, as you can see below.  

A perfect sweet ending to a delicious meal.

The girl made her own birthday card for daddy. The boy got a perfect score from his exam in computer class today, and declared that daddy will be proud of him today.  I am sure these are just the perfect gifts that J could ever receive today.  I still owe him a gift, but for now, my wish for him is to be blessed with good health, courage and wisdom as we go through our life's challenges, to be safe always, and to achieve success in his endeavors.

Happy Birthday! Hugs and kisses from me and the kids. We love you!

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Seeing Yellow, Black, and White: The Wedding

"Love is patient, love is kind.  It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud."
1 Corinthians 13:4

This is the unifying theme of last December's event.  Truly a joyous celebration with a "mix of serious, funny, laughter, tears, romance and comedy...that's life, that's marriage...", perfectly summed up by one of the couple's ninangs (godmother / lady principal sponsor). And I couldn't agree more. After almost 12 months of planning with the bride and groom, the yellow, black and white wedding has finally been concluded, and with a bang!

Sleek invitation with letter-embossed card stock, designed by the groom, with the footnote: 
Faith + Hope + Love. But the greatest of all these is love - 1 Corinthians 13:13

From the well-documented DIY preparations to the bride's teary-eyed walk down the aisle, the choreographed 90s re-mix of the couple's first dance, down to the wacky antics of friends Mike and K.O. who hosted the program (Mike, incidentally, was also getting married the next day -- you're such a trooper Mike! How could I have left you out! And K.O. was so spot-on with her witty remarks!), it was by far the most unique, poignant and riotous wedding I have ever planned and witnessed. Kudos to the newlyweds who did wonders on the very personalized, one-of-a-kind elements for their big day.  It pays to have two very creative individuals who know what they want, and how to do it, for this all important day of their lives.

  

Trial hair and make-up with stylist Peddy

An ocular inspection of the church last July, with some souvenir shots of the bride-to-be who's about to try to walk down the aisle

I was so excited to take as many pictures of everything that day (with my brand new digital SLR of course!) but it's quite impossible for me to be a director and photographer at the same time you know. So, I was only able to steal a few shots during the bride's preparations, some behind-the-scenes moments, and a few of the beautiful elements from the wedding.

The elegant bridal bouquet of ivory white tulips and yellow calla lilies, accented with pearl beads, hand-tied in satin black ribbon.

The artist at work

Loot bag for the girls and boys of the entourage

 

Yellow satin peep-toe bridal shoes with subtle pleats and bow

The bride and her well-made traje de boda

The afternoon Christian ceremony at Holy Trinity was solemn, intimate, and with bursts of laughter along the way.

 

A simple yet elegant dinner reception at the Mandarin Oriental provided the perfect backdrop for an evening of great food, good music and entertainment, with loads of wonderful surprises.

 Ceiling swags with crystal drops create a warm yet classy atmosphere

The set menu for the evening was just delectable, and I have already taken photos of each dish during our final food tasting at the hotel a week before the wedding.

Tuna tataki with garlic-saffron aioli, mango salsa and assorted greens -- the aioli complements the fresh sashimi perfectly!

Following this delectable tuna starter was the Carrot-ginger soup with Crabmeat wanton.  I was not able to take a decent shot of this flavorful, light cream of carrot with a hint of spice.

Roasted chicken breast on cauliflower puree, broad beans, pancetta and maple glazed shallots -- unfortunately, I was not able to savor this main course, and you know why  since I'm directing the whole program, and having been able to sit and relish the starters and dessert were a bonus already!

  Passion fruit crème brulee with raspberry sherbet -- need I say more? You bet I cleaned my plate with this one...seconds please!

 

 Lovely 3-layered butter walnut fondant cake topped with yellow gumpaste rose buds

I personally recommend this hotel for your banquet needs as they offer one of the best, if not the best, wedding packages in the city. This was also my choice for my own wedding seven years ago as they have the most beautiful table settings, sumptuous selection of international dishes, and an efficient and personalized service as part of their great value-for-money event packages.

 

Gorgeous centerpieces atop an all-black linen-covered tables

My wacky-happy couple who outdid themselves with the biggest project of their lives

Surprise opening dance number to a medley of 90s dance hits which got full attention from everyone, including the hotel's food attendants, wait staff and technical crew

Fun, fast and fantastic -- instant souvenir photos from Baicapture

A note to my dear friends, the newlyweds:
I'm sending you my love and best wishes, and hope you may have a blissful married life. Thank you for your trust and confidence, and for making me a part of this most joyous and memorable occasion.

Cheers!!!


Now, on to my last event -- a post-wedding cocktail party, happening later tonight!

Check out Part 1 of Seeing Yellow, Black, and White and see the other elements of their wedding.

My girl's favorite button with the dinosaur -- so apt, as I always remind her not to be rude when talking to people :-)


Planning this awesome event requires creativity, resourcefulness, persistence, and lotsa love from a great team of wedding partners:

Bouquets and Church Flowers - In Bloom Events by Joy Cheng-See, mobile: +63917-5301673
Hair & Make-up - Peddy Acebo (message him at his Facebook profile), mobile: +63917-6279120
Venue Styling - Larry Natividad of Wedding Library, 5/F SM Megamall B, Ortigas Center
Reception & Floral Arrangements - Mandarin Oriental Manila, Makati City
Church - Holy Trinity Church, McKinley Road, Forbes Park, Makati City
Photo/Video - ParkerShot Photography by JR Sebastian
Music / Sound System - JAV Lights and Sounds, (632) 7145736
Photo Booth - Baicapture, (632) 8941500

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Women's Favorite E-mail of The Year

Allow me a humor break for today's post before I get into my three-part series on a recently concluded parenting seminar at my boy's school. I found myself grinning from ear to ear as I read this message from my inbox sent by one of my mom-friends. Maybe some of you have already received one yourself.


For sure, most women out there, especially stay-at-home-moms, could relate to this and may find the story quite amusing and vindicating.

I am posting the email here, verbatim, so hope this puts a smile on your face as well.

A man was sick and tired of going to work every day while his wife stayed home. He wanted her to see what he went through so he prayed: 

"'Dear Lord,
I go to work every day and put in 8 hours while my wife merely stays at home. I want her to know what I go through. So, please allow her body to switch with mine for a day."
God, in his infinite wisdom, granted the man's wish.

The next morning, sure enough, the man awoke as a woman...
He arose, cooked breakfast for his mate, awakened the kids, set out their school clothes, fed them breakfast, packed their lunches, drove them to school, came home and picked up the dry cleaning, took it to the cleaners and stopped at the bank to make a deposit, went grocery shopping, then drove home to put away the groceries, paid the bills and balanced the check book. He cleaned the cat's litter box and bathed the dog.

 

Then, it was already 1 P.M. And he hurried to make the beds, do the laundry, vacuum, dust, and sweep and mop the kitchen floor. Ran to the school to pick up the kids and got into an argument with them on the way home. Set out milk and cookies and got the kids organized to do their homework. Then, set up the ironing board and watched TV while he did the ironing.

At 4:30 he began peeling potatoes and washing vegetables for salad, breaded the chicken and snapped fresh beans for supper. After supper, he cleaned the kitchen, ran the dishwasher, folded laundry, bathed the kids, and put them to bed. 

At 9 P.M. he was exhausted and, though his daily chores weren't finished, he went to bed where he was expected to make love, which he managed to get through without complaint. 

The next morning, he awoke and immediately knelt by the bed and said:
"Lord, I don't know what I was thinking. I was so wrong to envy my wife's being able to stay home all day. Please! Oh please, let us trade back. Amen!" 

The Lord, in his infinite wisdom, replied:
"My son, I feel you have learned your lesson and I will be happy to change things back to the way they were. You'll just have to wait nine months, though. You got pregnant last night."

This has been voted Women's Favorite E-mail of the Year!  If you agree, send it to all your friends who would enjoy this!

(",)  As I typed and read this again, memories run through my mind of what I have been doing for the past few years as a homemaker.  In this country, we are much fortunate to have helpers at home to share in the daily grind. Nevertheless, the "job" as a SAHM is a tall order and not every woman is cut out to be one. But being one is a great blessing, and which I consider more of a privilege. So guys, dads, don't complain!

Cheers to all moms out there who strive to provide a better quality of life for your families.

Time to take a break, and have an awesome weekend!

Note: All photos taken from Corbis Images 

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