Musings at 44

"Be the best version of you."
I'm still striving to be a better version of myself. Conscious effort talaga! As I celebrated my 44th last week, I realized not much has changed over the past year. Remember my last post here as a mid-lifer? Ganun pa rin naman. Priorities remained the same, but I guess dumami yung goals and wants ko for myself and my family.

Get more organized and start doing.
I am the number one procrastinator. Aaminin ko yan. Ever since I stopped working and committed to being a full time homemaker, I became lazy and less in control of what needs to be done. When I was still employed, my to-do lists kept me on my toes and made me very productive day in and day out. I also remember everything I need to do and things are in order. Nowadays... chaos. And I am known as "forgetful mommy", and that's really sad.  I need to listen more to my kids, and be more focused on the boy's homeschooling.  Ako kasi ang sabog, and I want to put him back to school na. We'll see.

Put "wife" first before "mommy".
I recently received this book, BOOK OF 40, and it chronicled the life experiences of the author, Kat Gomez-Limchoc, while presenting it through 40 inspired ideas and commemorating her 40th birthday. It was such a creative endeavor. The tone is light and fun, yet thought-provoking and interesting.  I'm not done reading yet, but after digesting a third of the book, it made me reflect on my own life and how I can pursue more enriching experiences for myself and my loved ones. 

The ideas she shared in the book are very relatable, and I'm sure my friends will love this book too. Ang daming lightbulb moments! One takeaway for me is idea #10 -- Keep Crushing on the Hubby.  She said, "we have neglected to take care of ourselves as a couple, when our schedules of work and other family responsibilities have become too full." I am guilty of this. The top-of-mind for me is what the kids like/need. I often forget what J likes and need.  This is something I have to work on -- to put him first.

Don't worry, be happy.
Again, effort din to have this mindset. I think for us moms, mas mahirap ito kasi you have to think of everything and everyone else's welfare before ourselves. It's not normal not to worry, diba? But I think the idea behind this cliché is to learn to let go and appreciate what we have, be in the moment, focus on the bright side and manifest positive results. Goal ko din yan. Good vibes all the way! =)

Less screen time, more real time.
Guilty rin ako with spending too much time online, in front of gadgets, and addicted to social media. While part of it is my work, I find myself too hooked and distracted by the online world. I'm an addict na. This circles back to my item no. 1 above. I know I need to lead by example so my kids will cut down on their gadget time too and be more productive. This will take time. I've already cut down on blogging and tried to sleep earlier. Baby steps. 

Some things I'm very happy to be doing are: eating "healthier", working out, and carving some time to chill and be among adults naman. Everyday kasi I am with the kids and house help. Wala akong kausap until J arrives from work. Kailangan ko ng social life! =)  So far, I'm able to balance this (I think), and hopefully maintain it, thanks to my friends who make time as well. Shopping helps too! My sartorial evolution is running backwards nga ata, coz I've been dressing down and picking less "mature" choices, hahaha, like with T-shirts and sneakers!

So there. Yan ang mga naisip ko habang nag-muni-muni nung birthday ko. I just hope I can follow through with my plans. Cheers!

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